The Onion: Honey Nut Cheerios Bee Given Horrifying Backstory

BuzzBee Given Traumatic Childhood as Part of Rebranding Effort

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We love it when The Onion tackles the marketing world. It makes us feel validated to see what we cover worthy of satire. But things take a really dark turn in today's story about a rebranding attempt for Honey Nut Cheerios.
Calling the psychologically intense new narrative a "fresh and interesting twist on a beloved character," General Mills said it would unveil a series of TV, web, and print ads relating, often in graphic detail, the Honey Nut Cheerios mascot's separation from his drug-addicted parents at a young age, as well as his near-constant emotional and physical suffering at the hands of a controlling, fundamentalist Christian foster father.
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