Ogilvy vice chairman Steve Hayden presented this parody ad Tuesday night at the Joe Pytka roast.
"The first time we had lunch, he ordered a broken leg of lamb. ... At pre-pro meetings he used to say, 'If I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you.'"
"In 25 years working with Joe, I can only remember having two problems. One of those was directing. The other was shooting."
"Working with Joe Pytka is like being trapped inside an episode of Oz, only with a really well-stocked craft services table."
"The first time I worked with Joe was on a Thom McCann commercial that involved a pair of shoes and a snake. He yelled at the snake and it died. We had to use a cat."
"Joe is a warm and positive force in our world. ... Shit, Joe's right. I can't act."
"Joe is of Polish descent and was raised in Pittsburgh -- by wolves."
"People ask me if working with Joe makes you more creative, and I say yeah. Every night after a Joe Pytka shoot, I go back to my hotel room and think of creative ways to kill his ass."
"I have had a great time. I've had a great time because I've drank some of the best wines I've ever had. And you haven't."