For those who are a little clueless on the Suri front, Life & Style gives a run down of the baby mystery ripe for controversy and speculation, offering conspiracy theories as to why the world hasn't seen her yet (their word: stay tuned). The magazine even offers a police sketch of the missing baby in case you unsuspectingly spot her.
Star really went to town on the Suri saga in this week's issue, leading with its story on "What's wrong with baby Suri?" According to the mag, nothing -- though her parents could be following Scientology advice to not allow her to be immunized. If that's the case, Suri would need to be kept indoors for six months to strengthen her immune system before being exposed, because she would have no whooping cough or measles defensives. Mark your calendar three months from now for that possible Suri sighting.
The weekly tabloid also weighs in further on why the infant has yet to be revealed, unlike most of her celebrity age set. Previous "horrors" mother Katie experienced while shooting "Dawson's Creek," primarily stalkers, have left the star more than cautious of the spotlight and determined to protect her child.
Once the couple does decide to introduce the child to the world, Star ponders the most likely places she will turn up. The best odds go to on a magazine cover for $5 million. Like Life & Style, the magazine also offers up its own image of Suri, albeit more like eight years from now. (Is that how long it will take to first glimpse the famous offspring?) Her famous father was slow to show his children from his marriage to Nicole Kidman, so this current behavior, by Cruise standards, is actually pretty normal. Only in the wake of Shiloh and other all-celebrity access does this type of closeted behavior seem kind of weird and unfair.
Star may have spoken a little too soon when the magazine wrote "No one -- not even the couple's friends or fellow Scientologists -- have seen Suri." The number of people who have spotted Suri is slowly increasing. Actress (and fellow Scientologist) Leah Remini of TV show "King of Queens" talks to Us Weekly, which has been keeping track of the days that pass without a photo on its website, and People about her recent visit with Suri. The first person to publicly report on a sighting tells the tabloids that TomKitten is "a newborn and normal size!" Thanks, Remini. All our Suri baby questions are now answered.
But the next question up for grabs is when -- or if -- the couple will marry. The tabloids agree that a date has yet to be set, with common reasoning being the new mother is waiting to shed the baby weight.