The Kafka Questionnaire

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What's the nastiest thing you ever said to a client?

"I'm really hoping your creative will rise to the challenge."

What's the most idiotic music request you ever had from a client?

"You don't happen to have Elias' phone number, do you?"

What would be the name of the Jennifer Lopez signature feminine hygiene spray?

Spray-Lo.

How many AEs can fit on the head of a pin?

I'll opt to avoid any obvious "pinhead" jokes here. AEs have had enough laughs at their expense - even if they do deserve them.

What's the next thing that needs to be microwaveable?

Account executives.

Invent the most preposterous corporate name for a sports stadium.

The Purina Arena.

What would be the song title if Eminem rapped about M&Ms?

"I've Got Your Blue One Right Here!"

What's the next big commercials music trend?

I think the music of the Scottish Highlands is due for a resurgence.

What instrument do you wish you could play?

Bagpipes.

Name a classic rock title that hasn't been pillaged yet and attach it to a product.

"Happiness is a Warm Gun," for Viagra.

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