Adages: Drop the Palm Pilot and make a date with these Madison Ave. Madonnas

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Firemen do it. Cops do it. Playboy Bunnies and Penthouse Pets do it. Even the stuffy membership of the Women's Institute of Great Britain did it once (if you buy the "true-life" premise of upcoming Touchstone flick "Calendar Girls"). Now, it's Madison Avenue's turn. A wall calendar filled with cheesecake and bristling bicep renderings of women of the ad world comes out this week thanks to the folks over at San Francisco-based Adages asked Miss December, aka Karin Onsager-Birch, art director at Goodby Silverstein in San Francisco, how it feels to be a pinup? "It feels good. It was just flattering to be asked," she said. The Storyboards staff checked out 125 candidates and settled on a dozen ladies including Hannah Plumb (Miss June) and Sophie Webb (Miss October) both of McCann Erickson, London.

"We originally wanted to do a Maxim-type of calendar," said Scott Ownbey, founder of Storyboards, but the calendar girls were afraid their bosses wouldn't approve. "So we quickly went with a more artistic slant." Warning: the International Women of Advertising Awards Calendar 2004 was not approved by The Advertising Women of New York, which vilifies sexist images of women in advertising at an annual awards event called "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly." Who cares? The calendar is available on

Elephant men

Move over SoHo House. The place to be seen last week was not the hot New York members' club, nor was it London's advertising canteen, The Ivy, or the Parisian stalwart, Costes. No, all eyes went east to exotic Jaipur, home of AdAsia 2003, the largest gathering of advertising, media and marketing domos ever seen in India. Over 1,300 delegates showed, and the scary thing for the likes of Dave Droga, Irwin Gotlieb and India's own superstar director, Tarsem Singh, was that unlike conferences in the jaded West, attendees did not skulk by the pool of the wondrous Raj Vilas or Rambagh Palace hotels but instead all showed up and actually listened to the speakers!

Some of them also played elephant polo at the Jaipur Polo Club, including Jeff Goodby's 14-year-old son Nat, who scored a goal he will never forget. Neither will the elephant.

An itch market

No, you don't smoke it, and it's not a hemorrhoid product. Zim's Crack Creme is an old time balm created by the Zim brothers of Berlin Center, Ohio, and it promises to soften up cracked and thickened skin on hands, elbows, knees and feet, according to the Web site The brand recently awarded its account to independent Western Creative Advertising of Redford, Michigan, which plans to break a campaign on TV that will no doubt rival the old Corn Huskers lotion effort. "We want to get the brand out to a bigger market," says Robert Taylor, creative director at Western.

Talk about hidey-hole markets: Crack creme was originally created for cement workers. Robert says now it's good for everyday dry skin and his ads will stroke that message. Git crackin'!

Contributing: Stefano Hatfield

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Next week: Kimberly Clark bathroom makeover finals

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