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It's only a matter of time before the Firecracker 400 becomes the Redenbacher 400: As difficult as this may be to believe, there's actually a stock car race called the Pop Secret Microwave Popcorn 400. Hey, maybe if we put a bag of the product on top of one those humongous overheated engines, all the friggin' kernels will pop for a change.

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Best Book Title of the Month goes to The Same Phrase Describes My Marriage and My Breasts: Before the Kids, They Used to be Such a Cute Couple. This is the latest droll little tome from Amy Krouse Rosen-thal, freelance copywriter, Chicago Tribune columnist and a mother of three who hasn't lost her sense of humor yet. $10.95, from Andrews McMeel Publishing.

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So Sonic Youth bassist Kim Gordon, the quintessential downtown avant-rock chick, is shilling for Calvin Klein. We can only assume that thousand-yard stare she's

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