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Two Spuds Up?
OK, we did beef porn, now let's do booze porn. A premium potato vodka, as seen in The New Yorker. In case you were wondering, the website says that seven pounds of "naturally-grown Podlasic potatoes go into every bottle" of Chopin. We can only hope this fragile waif doesn't have to peel them all herself. Does this ad have you dancing a wild mazurka? Do you feel baked, boiled or mashed after studying this photo? Rate the ad on a six-degree taste scale of excellence on the Sweet Meter, with 5 being the top score: 5 Very Sweet, 4 Sweet, 3 Semi-Dry, 2 Dry, 1 Extra Dry, 0 Sour. And feel free to offer your comments on the photography, the art direction, the copy, the concept, the logo, whatever. Click here to play.

It's Just Mac Enough
Last week's Rate the Ad. OK, we've got another winner — by the width of an oversalted fry. The Big Mac meat treat hangs on to go 51/49 on the Sweet Meter's Good/Bad ratio — comparing the top half of the meter to the bottom half — thanks to a big 21% Semi-Dry vote. It's running a decent 31% in the Sweet Zone but an indecent 37% in the Grimace Zone, so that so-so vote is crucial to its success. And you can bet your golden arches we got a ton of "buns" and "special sauce" jokes. There were also a load of beef connoisseurs who jumped on the fact that the ad suggests a Big Mac "isn't really meat." Anyway, here are the results.

5 Very Sweet 10%
4 Sweet 20%
3 Semi-Dry 21%
2 Dry 12%
1 Extra Dry 18%
0 Sour 19%

And here are some of our fave responses.

1 Completely wrong language and innuendo for such an American icon. Why stoop this low?

0 There is no way to make a Big Mac look good or even edible. This is a cry for help, and McDonald's may need a therapist after this one.

4 Makes an inedible product look pretty tasty.

2 If only they'd stopped after "OK, you can touch me." And I hate the split logo; why does the Big Mac even need a logo?

3 I remember the first time I ever ordered a Big Mac — I was shocked when I saw how small it was.

0 Disgusting.

5 Cool ad, I appreciate the humor. I'd like to see more like this.

1 The copy is killing me. Let's not even get into the visual.

1 Anthropomorphism worked for raisins.

0 Am I supposed to stop staring like it's a piece of meat because it's not really meat? Honestly, that's the first thing I thought of.

2 McDonald's doesn't need to advertise how "tasty" their burgers are anymore. Everyone has tried them and knows that they're horrible.

3 It doesn't look juicy enough, but the headline's brilliant.

4 The Big Mac has long needed a fresh ad approach, and this one's pretty good, all things considered.

0 I've never been keen on my food talking to me, or wondering whether a Big Mac was female, male or just a handful of fat, bread and salt.

2 Well, the Big Mac is airbrushed enough for porn.

4 Seldom do you get personality and product shot in the same ad. It happens here.

0 The world will be a better place the day McDonald's just comes to terms with and embraces its "uncoolness."

5 I felt simultaneously compelled to argue with the headline and lick my computer screen.

5 Clever copy and the product is the hero. I'm giving it a 5 and I'm a vegetarian!

1 Now my burger is talking to me like a feminist. I'll go for a Whopper!

1 Is that burger really on a bed? And is it really trying to seduce me? Then, no, I'm not Mac enough.

1 Possibly the least appetizing photo of a hamburger I've seen. And the type choice is more "Freddie vs. Jason" than "Betty Serves 'Em Up Hot."

4 What can you say, sex sells.

3 Looks like Mickey D's spilled a little Carl's Jr. on themselves.