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Client: Bud Ice

Agency: Goodby, Silverstein & Partners

Director: Roger Woodburn, Park Village Productions, London

And in the Use of Animals category,

the...man, I hate beer advertising these days. I do not get the thing with penguins. BMW, N'Ice, now Bud Ice? I don't know. Maybe the psycho-penguin anti-anthropomorphic beer drinker is the wave of the future, and I just missed it.

Client: BMW motorcycles

Agency: Fallon McElligott Berlin

This campaign threatens to be the Ultimate Advertising Machine. The design is sleek, clean and powerful. The words are steely-eyed and crisp. The photos are fast and furious. It's beautiful. But, alas, perhaps it's all the result of too much German engineering. I feel no soul. The throttle beneath me, the howling wind in my eyes, the world traveling far too slow. If I am asked to mutate, mutate. Discipline confines. Bikes set you free.

Client: Elephant Red

Agency: Glennon & Co.

This is not your typical beer visual. It drives home the point of, "A larger container than you might be accustomed to." Is this trying for appetite appeal? Who cares? These are the days of frogs and horses and penguins and bears. (Oh, my!) I like it. And my guess is it's an attitudinal thing that says, "If you don't like my elephant's ass, you're probably not my target."

Client: Fidelity Investments

Agency: Houston Herstek Favat

Director: Marcus Nispel, RSA/USA

I love the music, envy the production, want to know who cut it, film to wish for, type I can actually read .*.*. sorry. It kind of feels like someone took the Microsoft commercial and reshot it with some kind of "my killer rock 'n' roll track's better than yours" attitude. This campaign seems like the result of a great looking ripomatic. And probably one of the few times when the final spot looked even better.

Client: Polaroid

Agency: Goodby, Silverstein & Partners

Director: Kinka Usher, Smillie Films

And in the Use of Animals category, the winner is .*.*. damn, Goodby again. Just when you thought the old cat and dog thing was over, these guys create this little charmer in which a dog produces photographic evidence of a cat's household sins. It not only stirs up a warm and fuzzy feeling consistent with the brand's heritage, it actually creates a viable reason to have a previously obsolete product on hand. God loves a good demo.

Client: Steelcase

Agency: The Martin Agency

Maybe it's just that this was the last campaign I looked at; maybe it's that I was teaching a class in design recently. Or maybe it's that I grew up envying album cover and book designers. But how come all ads have the logo in the lower right corner?

It's too bad, because the idea is really smart. Elements of the design are beautiful. The visual is striking (no pun intended). I love using the elegant

S-shape as a design tool. I love the eye-pleasing, comforting pastel green. But for an office system that makes life more orderly...the ad isn't. The words are broken at inopportune moments. The ad does not gracefully and easily take me through. Form does not follow function, it leads it. So what does this say about the office system?

Client: Unocal

Agency: TBWA Chiat/Day/Los Angeles

Director: Jeff Gorman, Johns & Gorman Films

If you don't really have anything better to say about a gas station-and, really, what is there to say about a gas station-I guess you might as well tell people that you're unpretentious, friendly, just plain folks, thrifty, and simple, like gas stations used to be. This spot, which lampoons a director trying to sell a client on an outrageous campaign idea, says more without saying anything than all those spots in the world making empty promises. And it invites the viewer to laugh at all the undue performance our silly industry prides itself on.

Does it sell gas? I don't know, but it gives me a great feeling about Unocal and it lets me watch a TV spot and enjoy it.

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