Comcast Must Die: Part 3

The Fix Is In

Posted by Bob Garfield on 09.14.07 @ 12:20 PM

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

Craziest thing. Shortly after being held up to ridicule, contempt, anger and a fair amount of loathing, Qualmcast was all over itself to finish my aborted install and attend to all of my service grievances large and small. Two extraordinarily pleasant and helpful supervisors were in my home for four solid hours. I got four calls from customer-service people following up on my "issues," and I'm told I have a phone message waiting for me at home from a Qualmcast VP. No doubt it is simply oozing with regret.

And that regret is sincere. Qualmcast seriously regrets that the customer they mistreated so brutally was me. Because I have an audience, and friends in the blogosphere, including Jeff Jarvis, who has helped me spread the infuriating story far and wide. Qualmcast senior director of corporate communications Jenni Moyer deemed the outbreak of hostility as something that must be contained, so she issued a press release:

"We are appalled by the experiences that some customers have recently shared on blogs and in other forums. Where we have been able to identify customers who have had unsatisfactory service interactions, we have taken action to fix their problems. We recognize that it should not take a public event to have good customer service, and we are working hard to ensure that all of our customers receive the best possible service."

Not too bad. She didn't actually lie till the last clause of the last sentence. As the comment traffic has made abundantly clear, Qualmcast is not working hard to ensure that its customers are receiving the best possible service. It is working hard to reduce costs to be competitive with the other telecoms, who also treat customers shabbily, in order to compete with Qualmcast.

But the other stuff was true. They have taken actions to correct my problems, which may be lucky for me, but in no way pacifying. On the contrary, as a jihadist bent on destroying their corrupt system, I am angrier and more zealous than ever. Customer service doesn't mean kissing the ass of VIPs and putting everybody else in the hold queue till Groundhog Day. It means treating all your customers with dignity and respect, and investing all necessary resources to see that problems get solved immediately -- for everyone. Which, if institutionalized in company culture, would eventually cease to be an expense and instead be a priceless differentiator in a commodity category.

Think about Nordstrom. It has higher costs than its competitors, but also commands a price premium, because, duh, customers attach value to being treated like human beings.

So thanks for all the followup, Qualmcast. However, I cannot be bribed with ex-post-facto attentiveness, and I am by no means finished with you.

Oh, and by the way, my fucking phones still don't work.

6 Comments

By Mark | Chicago, IL September 14, 2007 03:05:37 pm:

So "two extraordinarily pleasant and helpful supervisors" were at your house for four hours and your phones still don't work?

This company deserves to be starved of revenues until it dies. And given how much debt it's carrying, that shouldn't be too long.

Bob, I'm sure you can arrange to get screeners for any cable show you want to see. Why don't you simply cancel the Comcast contract and do business with someone else?

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By bertfred66 | Baltimore, MD September 14, 2007 03:48:08 pm:

Bob,
It's obvious by the title of your book that whining and complaining is what you do best. Maybe it makes you feel important.......I don't know, nonetheless I have been extremely pleased with the service I have had from Comcast any time I have had to deal with them. The fact of the matter is, in any company you hope to have the best people working for you and I'm sure that is Comcasts goal, but sometimes you have to weed out the bad apples. Thus, you will have customers that have less than satifactory experiences. No company is going to have 100 percent satisfaction from every customer even if that is what they strive for, especially a company with as many customers as Comcast. The use of the terms "Jihad" and "Comcast must die" were a bit radical especially considering the date of the original post, but what speaks volumes is the fact that even after all these problems(which I suspect are greatly exaggerated), you haven't switched to another medium and you still want the service because it's probably the best thing going.
Bert Fred
Satisfied Comcast subscriber

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By ALISE | PORTLAND, OR September 14, 2007 10:25:29 pm:

Bob, some people still don't get it. If Boeing aspired to the same lofty customer service goals as Comcast, the countryside would be littered with wreckage.

Switching to another service provider is possible, but the only other choice is satellite. Cable is a monopoly in most regions, so if you want high-speed Internet access you'll then be stuck with another TelCo who doesn't give a crap about you so long as you pay your bills.

Is anyone from Google listening?

Jimmy Rossow, Detroit

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By rickbugmenot | Los Angeles, CA September 19, 2007 01:50:13 am:

Bob, We signed up for Comcast's triple play in out new home: cable, internet and phone. When the tech came to install the three services, phone, you want the phone? forget it, system doesn't work and won't be up and running for weeks if not months.......but they sold us a package.....I had to go to AT&T to get real phone service not just the basic dial tone and local calling only....We're still waiting for comcast-phone of what ever they called that service......But the tech did tell me try that other paragon of customer service.. Vonage

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By JENNIFER | GURNEE, IL September 20, 2007 11:01:11 am:

Bert,
There is a huge difference between "less than satisfactory experiences" and the type of thing Bob is going through. I also receive good customer service from Comcast and don't have any current complaints. The few problems I've had have been handled, for the most part, promptly and with courtesy. However, Comcast has an undeniably obscenely long track record of dismal service complaints. And I, for one, thank Bob for writing these blogs as I believe he is helping to bring this to Comcast's attention. This can only help in prompting Comcast to improve service to the thousands who are being ignored.

And although I've never had a huge problem with Comcast, I've had serious knock-down drag out fights with other companies, including HP and DirecTV, so I know how it feels to go through this. I suspect you, Bert, do not. At least, you display no empathy or even sympathy for those who have. It's infuriating and draining, and can have serious effects on one's mental and physical health.

Finally, your closing comment is purely ignorant. Most people, like myself, don't have any choice in high speed providers (I don't even get DSL in my area), and are therefore forced to be at the mercy of a single provider. Are you suggesting Bob use dial up?

Seriously, Bert, you need to get your head out of the sand.

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By goldeneye | New York, NY September 25, 2007 03:27:02 pm:

My Comcast disaster story involves the attempted interface between Comcast and my favorite old (new) technology, TIVO.

I was an early TIVO user and advocate, some would say fanatic. I had three TIVO boxes and only gave them up when I switched to HD TV's. They degraded the signal so much the other benefits were not worth it. So I switched to the Comcast DVR. Same as TIVO, right? Not even close. Although it did record in HD, the interface was clumsy, I never saw the end of a live event, and I was constantly missing programs I thought I had recorded. Comcast makes a bad DVR.

Then I saw a review of the new TIVO HD. I read everything I could, and then called TIVO to see if it worked with Comcast. "Absolutely", they said. It works great with Comcast. You need to get two "cable cards". Uh-oh. ..I called Comcast to get the cable cards and the operator said they did not work with TIVO. "Are you sure?" I asked. "TIVO told me they did work." So back to TIVO. "Oh, you need to talk to a supervisor. The best way is for the three of us to get on the phone together. I would be happy to set up that call if you would like." So I got on a three-way call between two companies that hate each other and me. Very strange.

After some coaxing by the TIVO rep, the Comcast supervisor admitted that the cable cards did indeed work with TIVO, but we needed to set up a service call to get them installed. Now, let me tell about a different experience I have had with Comcast repair and installation technicians. They ALWAYS show up on time at my house. I think it's because they know exactly where I live. They have been to my house nine times; no kidding, nine times. There's the inside the house guy who never talks to the outside the house guy. The cable guy, the internet guy, the phone guy.... And nobody talks to anyone else. They keep coming back to fix stuff the other guy messed up.
Back to TIVO. On the allotted day, at roughly the allotted time my repair technician, a guy with whom I am on a first name basis, arrives at the house. His greeting to me was: "I hate cable cards, they never work." "Why do you want TIVO?" "The Comcast DVR is great.""This will never work.""Did you know you can't get a program guide with cable cards?" I said, "Hi Joe, let's give it a try." Comcast must LOVE this guy, I'll bet he's employee of the month.

Installation of cable cards involves plugging the cards into two slots in TIVO, then calling a super-secret number and reading a bunch of numbers to the rep on the other end of the phone. This person is definitely NOT in Bangalore. After a lot of banter between the cable guy and the rep, with the cable guy repeating: "This is never going to work", I started seeing channels appear on the TV. Once that happened, the cable guy was out of my house like a circus clown shot out of cannon. His last words were: "Good luck with that mess."

Man I love TIVO. I'm getting all my shows, never miss the end of a live event and there is even a bunch of new stuff that comes over the internet. TIVO is back, and it's better than ever.

The really unfortunate part is what Comcast has done to poor TIVO. Here's a company that should own the world, but can't get out of its own way from a marketing standpoint. I know as a media guy I'm supposed to hate TIVO, but have you seen the new internet stuff you can do? It's really cool. -Carl Kotheimer, Savannah,GA

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