This Is the Closest K-Fed Will Get to a Grammy Win

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In the weeks leading up to the Super Bowl, Steven Schreibman was in advertising heaven. All thanks to Kevin. (Sorry, just couldn't resist the rhyme.) The VP-advertising and brand management for Nationwide Insurance was basking in glory as unprecedented buzz built up around the insurance company's Super Bowl spot.
Kevin Federline
Kevin Federline
Created by TM Advertising, Dallas, it featured Kevin Federline dreaming of himself as a rapper before being slammed back into the reality of serving up fries. With the exception of fast-feeder interest groups, everyone loved the ad. But who cares what millions of viewers, ad critics and media outlets think? The 238-member brain trust that makes up the USA Today Super Bowl Ad Meter ranked the spot second-to-last on its list. "I was just devastated," said Schreibman.

But did he just sit there and mope? Of course not. He set out to make sure his internal audience wasn't going to go all CareerBuilder on him. Standing in his office at Nationwide's headquarters more than a month later, Mr. Schreibman held up a DVD from a stack of dozens ready to be sent off to the company's top brass. Among the highlights: the seemingly endless news hits referencing the spot cut in between impressive stats: 3,584 print and broadcast news stories; 1,925 blog posts; $23.3 million in approximate ad value; the spot viewed 890,000 times on And just in case the DVD failed to make his case, Mr. Schreibman is sending employee-of-the-month plaques to top executives. No, they don't feature his own mug. Instead, the award goes to a smiling K-Fed.

Sadly, we'd left our Cylon costume at home
Adages has gone on the record before declaring "Battlestar Galactica" the best show on TV. Period. Though Sci-Fi Channel hasn't used our raves in press clips, we didn't hold that against the network when it sent us an invite to an upfront party. But the fact of the matter is it's the Lenten season, and the bulk of the Adages staff has gone off the sauce for the duration. Some of you may have noticed it's a bit harder to lure us out of the house these past few weeks. But Sci-Fi dangled in front of us a temptation we couldn't refuse: Grace Park, one of the stars of "Battlestar Galactica." Or, as a friend so delicately puts it: "One of those super-hot Cylon babes." We were even given a chance to speak briefly with Park who, along with other Sci-Fi talent, was doing the old meet-and-greet routine. We kept our fan-boy slobbering down to a bare minimum, said a few words and shoved off to the shrimp-and-oyster table before embarrassing ourselves by asking overly detailed questions about the trial of Gaius Baltar. Oh, yeah, we also met network Prez Bonnie Hammer and Zooey Deschanel, the star of coming Sci-Fi miniseries "Tin Man."

The surgeon general did not sanction this event
Maybe you didn't hear about the Master-Disaster Vending Machine Challenge II. Held on March 20, it featured grudge matches in which teams faced off to see which would eat the entire contents of a vending machine first. This year, The Onion faced off against AM NewYork and the Museum of Modern Art matched guts with Pocket Change. The results? It took AM NewYork 48 minutes and 50 seconds to beat the satirists from The Onion. And the MoMA crew threw in the towel after 56 minutes and 37 seconds. Justin Silverman, a staff writer for AM NewYork, wrote later in his paper: "A half hour in, AM NewYork Arts Editor Emily Hulme suffered a reversal (she puked) and was disqualified, leaving Contributing Editor Max Dickstein and this reporter to finish off the last few packs of candy."

Adages thinks the two winning teams should have duked it out for the championship, but we guess that would just be cruel.

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Contributing: Mya Frazier. Send your 'BSG' fan fiction to [email protected]
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