National Review: Why Does Kraft Hate Children?

Columnist Says Miracle Whip Campaign Is Threat to American Society

By Published on .

Did you know that Miracle Whip is so divisive a condiment that it can break the bonds of true love? That's the silly premise of a contest the Kraft brand is running. The "Not for Every Relationship" video contest encourages couples to explain how the spread can hold a relationship or break it up. The winning couple gets $25,000 for a wedding -- or divorce. Here's the promo, featuring a fake priest and a fake smarmy divorce attorney.

I'm sorry. Did I say silly contest? Beverly Willett has taken to National Review Online to call for a protest. Miracle Whip Brand Director Sara Braun tried to explain to her that the contest is all in good fun, but Willett is having none of that . As is to be expected from the vice chair of the Coalition for Divorce Reform.

Kraft's prize money is real. So try telling the 1 million new children each year who have to shuttle between two homes on alternate weekends that Kraft's 25 G's are all in good fun. Tell it to the millions of spouses whose lives have been ripped apart by unilateral divorces, often without cause. How about the mothers thrust into poverty by divorce? Some of them are paying for Kraft macaroni & cheese with food stamps at the supermarket checkout. Are they smiling? How about their daughters, whose odds of teen pregnancy increase with divorce?
Maybe she has a point. Here is one such couple, who are currently featured in spots running on TV. You can tell they're teetering on the very brink of divorce. ON THEIR WEDDING DAY!

Will Red State America rally behind the protest? Not likely, judging by the comments on NRO. Some side with Willett, but many others are bashing her for an overreaction to, well, a silly ad contest. Maybe those attacking her are libertarians or left-wing lurkers -- or maybe just those out there who for whatever reason had to go through a divorce and found that having a no-fault option made an emotionally scarring and potentially financially draining endeavor that much more tolerable (yes, I'm totally projecting).

Or maybe all of those people, along with Kraft and Miracle Whip, just hate children. Maybe there is a conspiracy. After all, one commenter, calling himself Stu Braun, writes:

I grew up in the same household as the Miracle Whip marketing director. It has been a dream, nay, an obsession of hers to destroy families via lighthearted sandwich spread adverts since she was a toddler. I'm glad someone is finally exposing her. I hope it is not too late.
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