Yesiree, this social-media thing really seems to be taking hold. Everybody who's anybody has figured out how to socialfy what used to be accomplished in analog fashion. It's all so thought-provoking and inspiring, but for me also a little embarrassing.
There's no bigger proponent of the Relationship Era than yours truly; I can talk the talk as well as anyone. As you know, in books and lectures and columns and consulting, I make a living at it. But, when push comes to shove, do I really walk the walk?
Oh, sure, I have a Twitter account. But @bobosphere doesn't hit send very often. I follow people who ovulate more than I tweet. I have a Facebook page, though it mostly gathers dust. I haven't looked at my own radio show's Facebook fan page in six months. You can put jumper cables on my privates and I still won't join FourSquare. I don't want you to know where I am ever, and I sure don't care where you're sipping chai, either. Have a scone. Go crazy, but leave me out of it.
See what I mean? Some evangelist I am. It's a shonda.
Obviously, this sorry situation calls for action, a bold gesture, to propel me into the orbit I so passionately commend to everybody else. But what? Shall I crowdsource my daughter's childrearing? Yes, that might expose her to some dubious parenting, but think of the carpooling! Or perhaps I should give something away for a free download. My latest book isn't finished, so maybe a haiku, spare and pretty:
Summer fades gently.
Check your tire pressure for
Labor Day Weekend
Or maybe I should just tweet out the images of my last colonoscopy. (Not a bad result, by the way. They found two small polyps and a brand new Starbucks.)
All of those possibilities are obviously attractive, yet they still seem too slight, too small, too unimaginative. I need something, well, bobospheric. So, as a down payment on my social-media rebirth, let me put it to you, my worldwide cult of acolytes:
What should I do to cement my bona fides and make my social-media mark? I will entertain all legal and non-vulgar suggestions, in the comments section here, on Twitter (#bobospherics), YouTube, whatever. Like this. Link this. Tweet this. Google+ this. Digg this. I need your help. Alone I am but one man with feet of clay. Together, we can put the "me me" into "meme." Together, we are an irresistible force.
And very possibly, the gods be willing, a future blog post.