Cruise Control: Bumpy Coverage of TomKat

What Everyone Is Talking About Today

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NEW YORK ( -- To prepare ourselves for tonight's "Primetime" interview with Tom Cruise on ABC, Watercooler cruised (sorry) this week's tabloids for juicy news about the soon-to-be Dad. It seems the Scientologist actor has prioritized promoting "Mission Impossible III" over supporting his fiancee, who is due to give birth to his child any minute now.
TomKat coverage will likely heat up as baby and MI: III are due soon.
TomKat coverage will likely heat up as baby and MI: III are due soon.

Life & Style calls the enormously pregnant Katie Holmes "increasingly miserable," and cites Cruise's promotional trip to Germany March 31 and his April 8 joyride in his World War II-era fighter plane, named "Kiss me Katie," as evidence of Tom "not caring for Katie but drumming up publicity [for his movie]."

Poor Katie. Not only is Tom not always at her side, he insists that she give birth in the silent manner Scientology requires (though he'll reportedly deny that tonight to Diane Sawyer). This week both Us Weekly and In Touch have photo features showing a series of photos of Katie's pregnant belly and speculating on the fluctuations in the size of her baby bump. In Touch describes her belly as "ever-changing," suggesting that it appeared smaller, then bigger, then smaller as her pregnancy progressed. According to Internet gossip reporter Perez Hilton, conspiracy theories abound. "Speculation is rampant that the baby is a scam," he told In Touch. Watercooler scoffs at this suggestion. There must be a TomKitten in the oven. Have you seen how exhausted that girl looks?

Us Weekly also jumped on the conspiracy bandwagon, analyzing photos of Katie's "VERY Long Pregnancy." Dr. Arthur Wisot, a Beverly Hills fertility specialist, told the magazine Katie's photos "do not show consistent changes in her abdominal girth." Dr. Wisot suggests the changing belly size could be part of a ruse to mask her due date. Yet, an Ob-Gyn more sanely suggests "it's probably more due to the way her weight has distributed."

Katie is on the cover of People this week, with a feature titled "The Private World of Katie Holmes." The story tells of Katie's life at the Cruise compound, a heavily guarded estate about six miles from the Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre International. People discusses how Holmes has put her career on hold since her pregnancy, doing no publicity for her comedy "Thank You for Smoking." This is a stark contrast to Tom's globe-trotting promo tour. People reports that when Tom was asked if he might miss the premier of "MI: III" in Rome on April 24 because of the baby, he responded, "Won't happen."

In other baby news, Watercooler would like to congratulate Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin on the birth of their second child and their wise decision to not name him after a piece of fruit. He's Moses Martin.
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