"Now, you know, folks, if you watch the show," Colbert says, "we kid the president about being a terrible person. But... in reality, it is much worse." Colbert then goes on to read Trump's Thursday back-to-back tweets in which he claims that Democrats simply made up the Puerto Rico death toll to make Trump look bad:
3000 people did not die in the two hurricanes that hit Puerto Rico. When I left the Island, AFTER the storm had hit, they had anywhere from 6 to 18 deaths. As time went by it did not go up by much. Then, a long time later, they started to report really large numbers, like 3000...— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) September 13, 2018
.....This was done by the Democrats in order to make me look as bad as possible when I was successfully raising Billions of Dollars to help rebuild Puerto Rico. If a person died for any reason, like old age, just add them onto the list. Bad politics. I love Puerto Rico!— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) September 13, 2018
Colbert, still doing his Trump impression, extrapolates from that "I love Puerto Rico!" closer by saying, "Yes, yes, you're my favorite bunch of lying, ungrateful fake dead people. I like Puerto Ricans who don't die!"
Colbert also notes that the final Puerto Rico death-toll statistic was actually released in August (see "Nearly a Year After Hurricane Maria, Puerto Rico Revises Death Toll to 2,975," from The New York Times), but "It had been pushed out of the front pages because of all the other bad news about Donald Trump. Then he brought it up again!" Colbert goes on to marvel at Trump's media strategy: "It's kind of like he was on trial for littering and said on the stand: 'I only threw that cup out of my window because I was distracted by the homeless man I ran over. Pretty sure he died of old age. OK? Democrats pushed him in front of my car.'"