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In his book "Mean Business," Sunbeam boss and all around nice guy Chainsaw Al Dunlap praises marketing chief Don Uzzi and the agency Uzzi hired, O&M/Chicago. "Best money I ever spent," Al says of O&M's '96 launch campaign. With losses rising, sales falling and the stock tanking this year, Al Uzzied Don. And Al put the account in review. Al also is firing 40% of Sunbeam's employees, though he gave himself a nifty three-year contract renewal including Mercedes, chauffeur, first-class travel for Mrs. Chainsaw and dental benefits. As the ads say, "Sunbeam -- now there's a bright idea."

`Windows' may swallow `Byte'

Will CMP fold Byte into Windows Magazine after its $28.6 million buy of Byte and other tech pubs from McGraw-Hill? CMP's not talking. Windows and ultra-techy Byte might seem an odd pairing. But ignoring duplicate circ and cancellations, the magazines have combined circs of some 1.3 million -- ahead of the 1.2 million of Ziff-Davis' PC Magazine. The mag merger is not a new idea: CMP about five years ago discussed buying and folding Byte into Windows but couldn't come to terms. Byte once was the nation's largest computer magazine but was eclipsed long ago by PC Mag. Even if CMP does a merger, ZD expects its mag to remain No. 1 in circ.

Client auditions will start soon

Unemployed TV actor Jerry Seinfeld tells the latest Rolling Stone more about his scheme for opening an ad agency, explaining he likes the idea provided he can sign clients who wish to have no input. Clients, in Jerry's view, should be seen but not heard. "I find a great commercial to be very uplifting because it's right in the middle of all this crappy TV, and they're selling me something, and if you can somehow make that fun for people, it just seems like a great service to provide," Jerry says. "I'm very appreciative of people who put work into making commercials entertain them, because we have to watch them."

Virtually wed . . . idol threat

Revlon's Ron Perelman, in the midst of divorcing Wife No. 3 Patricia Duff, bought a piece of WeddingChannel (, an online bridal registry and guide to getting hitched. . . . N.Y. American Mktg. Assoc. named two virgins to the Marketing Hall of Fame. One is Richard Branson's Virgin Atlantic. The other is 39-year-old Barbie. . . . How hard did Goodby Silverstein work to make the short list of Kinko's? Not very. Kinko's asked if it could include Goodby on the list -- even though the copy shop king hadn't met with the agency or discussed the pitch. Goodby may drop out if printer client Hewlett-Packard sees Kinko's as a conflict. . . Spotted on the subway during the one-day New York taxi stop

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