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Going Up?
Redwood Creek. Here's a wine ad with a taste for adventure. Is the flavor carrying you away? Rate the ad on a six-degree taste scale of excellence on the Sweet Meter, with 5 being the top score: 5 Very Sweet, 4 Sweet, 3 Semi-Dry, 2 Dry, 1 Extra Dry, 0 Sour. And be sure to comment on the illustration, the art direction, the copy, the concept, whatever. Click here to play.

Baby Got Boost
Last week's Rate the Ad.Where Boost Mobile at? Well, we can tell you where it ain't at. It ain't knockin' mad boots with the Sweet Meter. Though this debacle doesn't even approach the abject failure of that 1800 tequila ad with the female flasher back in August, Boost, with a 28/72 Good/Bad ratio — comparing the top half of the Sweet Meter to the bottom half — and a wack-smacking 60% in the Grimace Zone, has had its dome capped. The bugbear of "pedophilia" popped up regularly in the comments — a surprising number of people think the little girl in the pink is wearing an outfit suitable only for Jennifer Lopez — along with the nearly forgotten "Ebonics," with many remarks betraying an urban-marketing bafflement that frequently gives way to outright disgust. There is a loyal minority, however, who applaud Boost's attempt at humorously setting itself apart from the main wireless playas. Anyway, here are the results.

5 Very Sweet 7%
4 Sweet 8%
3 Semi-Dry 13%
2 Dry 12%
1 Extra Dry 20%
0 Sour 40%

And here are some of our fave responses.

5 The world is going hip-hop. Creator of this has mad skills.

0 Spoofing the old folks rollin' OG was funny. But this isn't nearly as fresh. Perhaps the lingo is a bit too obtuse — even for the Maxim reader — and the photo isn't nearly campy enough to pull the idea together.

0 Doesnt [sic] compell [sic] me to do anything except to learn English.

0 Headline from da 'hood. Art direction from the 'burbs. Concept from somewhere I've never head of.

3 Why are we promoting little hoochie mamas?

0 I even typed it into Google and I still don't know what "Word is bond" means. I'm not even sure what this Boost walkie-talkie is. And why do children like it?

1 Don't use hip-hop slang if you're not hip-hop. And what pedophile is tryin' to holla at this baby girl?

2 Tries hard to match the cool factor of the recent TV spot, but fails miserably. The image and copy just don't go together.

3 I like the concept, but they should've exaggerated the urban clothing and lifestyle quite a bit more to make it funnier. You could have these kids ridin' a pimped-out little H2, all decked out in Roca and bling-bling.

1 She's calling her crew to let them know her ride was just overhauled on Pimp My Trike.

1 Wow. I am so not the target. This ad blows right by me. Maybe I'll have to slit my sociocultural wrists.

0 OK, this scares me. Are our values such that we're saying 4-year-olds need to be connected? And am I so old that simple English is dead?

1 Please tell me that she has JUICY written on the back of those shorts.

1 Can you hear me now? No? Maybe it's because I'm 5 and I don't even know how make a call on this thing.

2 I've been told that I'm too whitebread. This either confirms that or the ad really makes no sense, especially for the Maxim reader.

2 I've had it with the "Hey, let's take kids and put them in a situation that normally only adults would find themselves in" ads. These ads are all over the place and the novelty is wearing off fast.

0 The person who wrote this probably still says "Get jiggy wid it."

0 Showing the mobile in the hands of a kid makes it look big, hence not cool.

0 Perhaps the copywriter and art director should have used a set of these to communicate better.

5 Boost knows its audience. This isn't Qwest or Sprint trying to widen its consumer base.

4 It's not AT&T or Verizon. Doesn't look like Cingular or sound like Sprint. Maybe Virgin, but not so British. Boost? Yes, I will take one with my Jamba Juice.

0 This is the advertising equivalent of Bulworth with Warren Beatty. I'm embarrassed and I didn't even write it.

5 Fa shizzle! Ganksta preskoolers with beep-beep. And you know homegirl with the polka dot bat was all "I know how to accessorize."

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