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Yellow Tail wine. After Toshiba, surely this is simplicity itself? Can you drink to it? Rate it on the Rate the Ad-o-mometer's six-degree scale of excellence, with 5 being the top score: 5 World-changing, 4 Great, 3 Good, 2 Fair, 1 Forgettable, 0 Actively Annoying. And feel free to comment on the art direction, the photography, the tagline, the typography, the logo, whatever. Click the ad to play.

Go Directly to Jail
Go Directly to Jail
Last week's Rate the Ad. We thought maybe the idea of picturing the product box rather than the product would meet with some approval. Well, maybe in another ad it would, but not here. Note to advertisers: when you have an ad in which nothing makes any sense, don't ask, "What's stopping you?" The answer will invariably be, "This ad is stopping me," which became the theme of the week in a veritable flood of irate commentary from the none too happily confused. The result is an appalling Good/Bad Ratio on the Rate the Ad-o-mometer of 6/94 — comparing the top tiers of the scale to the bottom tiers — which almost matches the Bill Ford fiasco of some weeks ago, now officially known as They Taurus a New One, and easily exceeds the awfulness of the 1812 tequila ad with the female flasher, which for a long time was the gold standard of Rate the Ad wretchedness. But no more. All we can say about Toshiba is, they got theirs. We'll let the comments enumerate the many disconnects in this ad, in which the sum of the parts equals a whole lotta What?! We did get one apparently sincere positive remark, and we lead with it, just to get it out of the way. So here are the results.

5 World-changing 0%
4 Great 1%
3 Good 5%
2 Fair 7%
1 Forgettable 38%
0 Actively Annoying 49%

And here are some of our fave responses.

4 Simple. Easy. Different. I follow his eye to the box, which is integrated with the USP. Nice.

0 Don't go away with that drill. I may need it to relieve the pressure in my head from trying to figure this one out.

0 I know!! That elderly woman is reminding him that life is far too short not to have a RETARDIFYINGLY GINORMOUS TV!!

1 So who got the TV? The prison or the senior home next door?

1 Perhaps they should go back to thinking inside the box.

1 Brett Favre sure has an ugly house.

0 Why is a construction guy wearing brand new sneakers? How did he end up where there is no construction site but he's holding the drill like he has a job to do?

0 Is this a missing scene from Eraserhead?

0 Is that a carpenter working on a brick building with prison bars?

0 What's stopping me is the gash (or is it a shaved area?) in Grandma's head.

0 Maybe the guy hears voices, and the box is talking to him and suggesting he kill Grandma with the drill. But what's stopping him is the fact that he's right outside a prison.

1 Does he really need that many tools to assemble the TV?

0 Drop him down the sidewalk grate, put Grandma in the box and start over. Please.

1 When I walk around town with my manly toolbelt and my drill casually gripped in my hand, I, too, often ponder the trash outside of local prisons while acting like I'm not totally checking out the cans on Granny.

0 I was out taking my power drill for a walk when this TV box stopped me to ask for directions to a better ad.

0 I see a Brett Favre clone teaching the old lady from The Wedding Singer how to take apart a television with a drill.

0 Is she walking funny from a conjugal visit?

0 I'm fairly confident there's a dismembered body in that box.
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