COLGATE REACHES BACK 44 YEARS FOR `REVOLUTIONARY' PRODUCT'S SLOGAN

You know that advice from philosopher George Santayana, "Those who ignore history are bound to repeat it"? Advertising people are very good at ignoring it. As I've lamented before, the industry knows little more about what makes advertising work than when Philadelphia retailer John Wanamaker complained that he didn't know which half of his advertising budget was wasted. (Reader Chuck Cohen wrote me the other day that I inadvertently referred to Mr. Wanamaker as Henry in a previous column. "Who is Henry? A brother or son? Please let me know because I refer to that quotation regularly!" Mr. Cohen said.) Colgate-Palmolive Co. just brought out what it is touting as a revolutionary toothpaste that combats such dread gum diseases as gingivitis. Yet through ignorance or stupidity, the company reached back to steal a slogan Procter & Gamble Co. used to launch nationally Gleem toothpaste 44 years ago. Gleem was heralded as the toothpaste "for people who can't brush after every meal," as you recall. That slogan was totally bogus, of course, because nobody brushes their teeth after every meal. It was an empty claim, even back then. So why is Colgate trumpeting far and wide, "Now there's a toothpaste so advanced it even works when you're not brushing"? Even in the early '50s, the claim that toothpaste has residual value after you brush was so self-evident as to be meaningless. Does anyone really think that you have to brush your teeth 24 hours a day to keep away the bad things that can happen inside your mouth? This is not the way to introduce a breakthrough product, by borrowing from a slogan that didn't make any sense when Eisenhower was president. Mr. Santayana, you're right once again. There's probably lots of dumb claims that can be revived today, especially since there seems to be a dearth of original thinking in the ad business. For instance, Listerine, back in 1926, advertised itself as a cure for dandruff. "We all have reason to be concerned about dandruff" especially for women with bobbed hair "for it is a germ disease which, unless properly treated often brings with it loss of hair or possible baldness." If new Colgate Total can make the revolutionary claim its formula actually works between brushing ("Takes a licking and keeps on ticking"), surely Warner-Lambert Co. is justified in bringing out All-Purpose Listerine that works equally well in your mouth and on your head. "Try Listerine some evening when your scalp feels tired and itchy ... you will find it a stimulating tone for the scalp, and in addition to combating dandruff, you will find it adds that luster and softness to the hair that is so important a part of being well-groomed." That was the actual copy that ran in the Aug. 1, 1926, issue of Country Life, and doesn't it have a nice sincere ring to it? As long as I'm in a historical mode, let me mention a letter I received from Tom Messner of (this will take a while) Messner Vetere Berger McNamee Schmetterer/Euro RSCG, New York. I wrote a column about David Brinkley's ad gig and Tom pointed out that Mr. Brinkley's old partner, Chet Huntley, also had an ad connection. Mr. Huntley, Tom recalled, "went David one better. He started an agency (Levine Huntley Schmidt Plapler & Beaver, nice name that)" -- you should talk, Tom. "An agency that thrived after his death, eventually reaching more than $250 million in billings and becoming a subsidiary of Grey, where it became as moribund as Mr. Huntley." I really think one of the sad things about the advertising business is that ad people have little recollection or knowledge of the industry's colorful past. Since our family newspaper has been around since 1930, it's easy to dip into our archives from time to time. For instance, Ed Stern, retired media director at Foote, Cone & Belding, Chicago, wrote me about the time he was an office boy at an agency -- his first job -- and the head of the agency was gunned down by a shotgun blast. And we think we've got it tough! More on that next week.

COLGATE REACHES BACK 44 YEARS FOR `REVOLUTIONARY' PRODUCT'S SLOGAN

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