Top 10 Names Rejected in the Comcast/Xfinity Rebranding
Can Comcast please catch a break already? First the media conglomerate decides to buy NBC Universal, only to see the flagship network spectacularly self-destruct with Lenogate. Now it's drawing snickers from all quarters for its announced rebranding -- which officially starts rolling out this week -- to Xfinity. Time magazine's Sean Gregory ran a piece titled "Comcast's New Name: Rated X?" in which he straw-polled people on their first thoughts about the name. "Porn," "porn," "stupid," "an energy drink or a porn site," were among the responses.
Besides, it could have been worse -- a lot worse. A source* leaked the following secret document to me; it's the short list of finalists in the Comcast rebranding, any of which could have gotten the green light:
- XXXfinity (the original preferred name, until it was determined that signage costs could be trimmed 22% by "right-sizing" the brand).
- Xf (dismissed for fears wags would dub the company "F/X for dyslexics").
- Comcastr (vowels no longer have street cred if you want to be seen as a digital player, but annexing a consonant? Totallyy hott).
- XXXtria (too evocative of smoking porn, a little-known niche that actually dominates the French adult-film industry).
- Xyfy (too close to Syfy?).
- BGMD (Bob Garfield Must Die).
- Xenadrine (already taken).
- Xena, Warrior Princess (ditto).
- Xyience Xenergy (turns out that was already taken by ... Xyience Xenergy, the maker of Xyience Xenergy Cherry Rush, Apple Jak'd, and Blu Porn energy drinks).
- Philip Morris.
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Simon Dumenco is the "Media Guy" media columnist for Advertising Age. You can follow him on Twitter @simondumenco.